I May Have Started World War 3

To make room for a growing team at my call center, my smaller team will be moving to a new area starting tomorrow. I didn’t expect the move to be so problematic.

Thursday I was sitting in my usual seat. I’m the last seat on my row and sitting around the corner from me at the end of the aisle is, let’s just call him my neighbor.

I had an issue with my neighbor when he first started in the department. He would talk nonstop and be nosy about the specifics of calls I just had. Another thing that irked me was his tendency to ask me a question and as if I’m a dumb woman who didn’t know what I was talking about, go ask a male in the department the same question. Of course that male coworker would give him the exact same answer I did.

It took some work but I finally have my neighbor trained properly. Other than an occasional bout of nosiness, he’s not such a nuisance anymore except for one thing.

Mr. Neighbor eats crap he shouldn’t and I have to deal with the consequences. On several occasions he’s stunk up the joint, belching, farting and groaning all evening.

Thursday afternoon, shortly after my shift started he started annoying me. While the typical worker may have an apple at his desk, he was eating raw onions. I love onions, don’t get me wrong but at home when I’m cooking. Our office shouldn’t smell like Subway. If you want to eat onions at work, that’s what the atrium/lunch room is for.

On my break I walk past my supervisor. I’m not really complaining but just joking with her that when our team moves I don’t want to sit near my neighbor and have to deal with his smelly issues. She laughs and asks if I’ve seen our new home. I say no and she walks me down there.

As she’s showing off the new area she tells me to pick my new seat. I’m looking for someplace quiet without having to worry about annoying coworkers. I tell her I’ll figure it out by the end of her day and let her know.

Without saying a word to anyone I quietly send my supe an email telling her the seat I selected. I’ll be sitting next to two coworkers who have computers specialized for their work. That means I won’t have any surprises when it comes to sit next to me.

She responds with a joking email saying she’ll probably be the one stuck with my smelly neighbor and all is well or so I thought.

Right after she sends an email to me an email goes out to the entire team. She notifies them of the seats that are now unavailable, the two designated to the billing team and mine.

“We can pick seats?!” An inhuman howl pierces the serenity of our department.

A commotion spreads throughout our team as the word gets around that someone has already picked their seat.

Another email goes out announcing that two more seats have been taken and things roll downhill from there. My team isn’t happy. I can practically see the dark cloud looming over our department.

I hate to say it but the women on my team are the only ones pitching a fit. The majority of the people in my department are lifers. They’ve been there forever and they aren’t going anywhere. Most of them have more time than I do. I guess the announcement of seats being claimed ruffled a few feathers and smashed a few toes.

Another bone of contention is Mr. Man. Mr. Man is a coworker who talks way too much and is always in everybody’s business. He’s known for walking behind you just to see what’s happening on your computer. He’s a rat who’s quick to tattle on advisors from other departments and has on several occasions walked down to personally tell their supervisors if he doesn’t like how they transfer a call to him. Needless to say, no one wants to sit next to him.

Some of my coworkers leave their desks even though it’s not their break time to pick out their seats. Complaints are running rampant and things are getting out of hand rather quickly. All the while I’m feeling bad that I got to pick my seat, which I never even asked for. If our boss hadn’t sent out that email this wouldn’t have even happened.

After an hour of gripes and belly aching she sends out a final email. Since there’s a problem picking seats, she’s going to assign them.

The already bad situation gets even worse. Now they feel that they’re being treated like children and they still aren’t happy. I’ve got coworkers talking about getting HR involved and it’s a total disaster. All this unnecessary drama for something as stupid as where we sit. I was glad to leave that day because I couldn’t take the negativity.

I felt so bad about the entire fiasco that I sent my supervisor an email and apologized that things turned out the way they did. No good deed goes unpunished.

Now tomorrow is D-day. Our department will be officially moved and in our new home. I’m just hoping that when I get there our department isn’t covered in police tape.

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